“Divide people into hostile groups by constantly harping on controversial matters of no importance . . Cause a breakdown of the old moral virtues; honesty, sobriety, continence, faith in the pledged word, ruggedness.” – Communist goals for the 20th century
THE BOLSHEVIK COUP WAS IN 1917. The centennial is fast approaching and the Praetorian news media are salivating like Pavlov’s dogs. The “prize” is America (they think). They have been carpet-bombing us with a P.R. blitzkrieg for years. Their TV and cable artillery has softened up the people toward socialism, and the Pope’s “blessing” is the icing on the cake. They think the ultimate progressive coup is predeterminable, Bernie or no Bernie. Another Red Revolution, without firing a shot.
The baby boomers are leaving behind helicopter parents who are going to leave behind “snowflakes” who can’t even stand up to words or raindrops, let alone professors and journalists or the celebrity culture. Just Google “UW-Milwaukee, just words” and you’ll find a list of words that are being verboten to protect political correctness – including the word “politically correct”! Examples elsewhere are “fathering,” “mothering,” “hard worker,” and even the Lord’s name (eventually church bells too). I wrote a column on this subject in July, and the sickness is only getting worse, so here’s a revised excerpt from “An Anti-antidisestablishmentarian goes into a bar”:
IT’S FUNNY BUT you seldom see a man of the cloth go into a saloon. I wonder why? He could probably fellowship with some of his parishioners and wine-bibbers. But I guess you have to be careful what you say in a saloon these days. One wrong word and some people go postal, if I can say that one. I know a man who almost got into a bar fight for saying, “It sure is nice to see more black kids playing baseball these days.” He had no idea that the word ‘baseball’ could almost cause an aneurism. I guess times really have changed, but I wonder if even the word change has changed too?
Our own Supreme Court says that words don’t necessarily mean what we always thought they meant. Well, excuse me! Some people may be wound a bit too tight – and they aren’t the people who used to be accused of such. Where are the Jeffersons now that we need them (the ones on TV)? It’s funny but even comedians are avoiding college campi these days. Tough audience. The students aren’t offended by cuss words; they just don’t think anyone should be laughing when America is so full of ‘xenophobia’ and ‘genderism’ like never before, which reminds me of a joke:
A newly graduated preacher got called to a small town on the high plains. The parishioners were on the “mature” side and he had to perform quite a few funerals (the first word in funeral isn’t “fun”). Finally he got to do a wedding. He did just fine until he got to “You may now kiss the . . whatever.” Then, out of sheer habit, he says, “The congregation may now come forward to view the remains.” Did I mention it was a gay wedding?
OOPS. Did I just misspeak (even though words supposedly don’t mean what they used to mean)? By the way, hidden in the title of this column is the word “arian” (sic), but just for the record, I am not a white supremacist (in fact, I’m beginning to get a downright inferiority complex about the subject). I’m also getting tired of hearing my grandmother called a right-wing extremist. Aren’t you? Somewhere it is written, honor your mother and grandmother, ain’t it? When I was in kindergarten, that was about the only forbidden word, back in the 40s. My teacher hated the word. Was she therefore a “hater”? These days one can’t even say “Nature abhors a vacuum” without being labeled a hater.
One cannot even say “All lives matter” or “The human race”! Too color-blind. Not enough diversity! And you guys is a sexist term these days. Verboten! I didn’t mean to get into politics, but the silly season has begun. Where is Art Buchwald now that we need him? By the way, I heard that the Redskins are being forced to change their mascot. It’s going to be Mr. Potato Head, and they’re threatening to move to Boise if Washington doesn’t get off their backs. You have to laugh or cry, and you can’t have it both ways.
By the way, I thought about starting my autobiography the other day. “If you don’t know where to start,” they say, “start at the beginning,” so I thought about those banned words, fathering and mothering. When I was conceived, “divorce” was an ugly word, and people didn’t even say “pregnant”; they said “WITH CHILD.” If a modern feminist heard that term today she would consider it a microassault and run off to the campus “Safe Room” for comfort. Saying “With child” was considered common sense and courtesy. It wasn’t censorship; it was a statement of FACT.
There’s an old Native saying- I don’t say Native “American” because they’re stealing that from Amerigo Vespucci – “If the very old will remember, the very young will listen.” I’m not THAT old, but I intend to leave behind some memories (and hope that the words don’t “change”!). At the moment, if I wanted to leave some good advice for young people, I would say “Never marry the girl who was the captain of her school debate team!” Is it still okay to say girl? And is any debate still allowed? [BTW, I never said all these lines are original; all I said was, “It’s funny, but – “]
P.S. That’s the end of the excerpt. Sorry if you read it before, but “if just one” newbie gets to read it, okay; it’s “for the children.” Oh, we should all plug Rush Limbaugh’s newest book, released this week. Great timing, Rush! As Francis Bacon once said:
“Books will speak plain when counselors [pundits] blanche.” [They are.]
PPS: There is no perfect system, but America beats Venezuela! Arthur Miller said, “An era can be said to end when its basic illusions are exhausted.” But it’s not free enterprise that is ending; it’s socialism. Our colonies were founded on Biblical-style freedom, and by 1776 we already had the highest standard of living for all classes anywhere in the world. In 1776, the Earl of Orford said:
“This world is a comedy to those that think, a tragedy to those that feel.”
But who says we can’t do both? In 1775 he said something a bit different:
“By the waters of Babylon we sit and weep, when we think of thee, O America.”
WAS THAT AN EXCESS OF PESSIMISM, OR A PROPHECY? TIME WILL TELL.
© Curtis Dahlgren